True Power is Self-Control: Energies to Anchor Your Strength
We live in a world that praises the loudest voice in the room. The boldest comeback. The most dominant presence. As a Gen X'er, this is in our DNA.
But here’s something I’ve learned — often the hard way:
Real power isn’t loud. It’s self-control.
It's knowing how to hold your energy without flinging it everywhere like a monkey with their steaming feces. It's knowing when to speak and when silence is the sharpest sword you’ve got. It’s emotional discipline — not suppression, but discernment.
And it’s been the most liberating shift in my personal growth journey.
My Turning Point: Saying Less, Holding More
There was a version of me that believed I had to explain myself to be understood. That speaking more made me look strong, that arguing back meant I wasn’t being walked over.
I’d burn my energy trying to prove my point — overthinking texts, typing out paragraphs, replaying conversations in my head. Sound familiar?
But at some point… I started feeling tired. Not just physically — energetically. I was bleeding power — like a thousand paper cuts to my soul, each one sharper than the last, until I was standing in an energetic puddle of my own undoing.
So I tried something different. I started saying less. Holding more. Observing more than reacting. And at first? It felt unnatural. Like I was letting people "win." But it wasn’t about them — it was about reclaiming me.
The more I embraced silence, the louder my presence became.
I stopped justifying myself. Stopped over-explaining. Stopped talking myself out of my own knowing. And I could feel the shift — in my body, in my nervous system, in my energy field. In my relationships.
I had more clarity. More peace. More power. Saying less gave me more. More space to listen to my intuition. More energy to pour into what actually matters.
Now, I don’t rush to respond. I don’t fight to be understood. I don’t react on command. I choose my energy. I protect my peace. And that, my loves, is a whole frequency.
Energies to Work With for Embodied Power
Shadow of the Inner Tyrant
This inner archetype shows up when I’m triggered — that urge to clap back, dominate the convo, or "win" an argument.
How I work with it:
- I sit with the question: “What part of me is afraid right now?”
- I invoke Lilith energy — not to explode, but to walk away rooted in my worth.
New Moon Energy
Every new moon, I reset my boundaries. I realign with my why.
My ritual:
- I write one intention: “My energy is mine to command.”
- I light a black candle and sit in stillness — not doing, just being.
Solar Plexus Chakra
When I started choosing silence, I had to rebuild my relationship with confidence — not performative confidence, but internal strength.
Support tools I love:
- Solar plexus breathwork (inhale into the belly, exhale with a slow hum)
- Citrine on my altar
- Daily mantra: “My calm is my strength.”
Autumn Energy
Autumn is the season that taught me to release. The trees don’t argue — they just let go. And so can we.
Simple practice:
- I take barefoot walks and literally imagine my stress falling off me like leaves.
- I journal what I’m releasing: “I release the need to prove myself. I return to stillness.”
Final Word: Stillness Is a Spell
Self-control isn’t about bottling things up. It’s about learning to hold yourself — even in the heat. Especially in the heat.
It’s mastery. It’s energy sovereignty. And it’s how you stop living in reaction mode and start living in ritual. Because your peace is sacred. Your silence is spellwork. And your true power? It never begs to be seen — it radiates.
The following is what I repeat to myself multiple times per day, and is included in my Mind Movie that I watch morning and night without fail:
I have sovereignty over my own energy.
Only what is for my highest good may enter my field.
All else is returned to its source with love.